Wednesday, March 14, 2007
got this from ate shine's blog...
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The "parang kayo, pero hindi" stage.
Others call it MU or mutualunderstanding.
Pseudo- relationships. Pseudo-boyfriends. Pseudo-girlfriends. Flings. Almost like a relationship, but not quite.
It is aphase where the persons involved are more than friends, but notquite lovers. Puwedeng may verbal agreement, puwedeng wala.
One or both of you may have admitted your feelings, possible dinghindi. You just let your gestures do the talking for you.
Walangpormal na ligawan na nangyari. Hindi kayo mag-dyowa. Pero sakilos niyo, sa mga sinasabi niyo, parang kayo, pero hindi.
This kindof "relationship" can happen at different stages for different reasons.It can happen after a break-up. You still love each other, and youwant to be with each other but you broke up for a reason.
And forreasons that you alone know, ayaw niyo na muna magkabalikan. Itcan also happen before a relationship, iyong pareho kayongnakikiramdam.
Possible din na ayaw niyo munang mag- seryosokaya kunwa-kunwarian lang muna. Testing lang.
Puwede ring hindipuwedeng maging kayo kasi isa sa inyo may ka- relasyon na. Kayahabang hindi pa siya nakikipag- break doon sa boy/girl (sabi niyamakikipag- break siya soon pero di naman niya ginagawa), walamuna kayong relasyon para nga naman hindi siya nangagaliwa kasi"hindi naman kayo."
This pseudo-relationship stage, for a time, canbe fun. Lalo na kung naghahanap ka lang naman ng "kalaro." Perohuwag ka lang mag-e-expect na may patutunguhan kayo kasi walatalagang kasiguraduhan.
So bakit ang daming nagse-settle saganitong set up ganoong hindi naman sigurado kung maypatutunguhan? Iba't ibang dahilan. Puwedeng for fun lang.Puwedeng "buti na iyan kesa wala" or puwede na iyang "pantawid-gutom." Meaning, habang wala pa iyong the real thing, doon munasa kunwa-kunwarian. For those who are not in a seriousrelationship, they would think that pseudo- relationship is betterthan no relationship at all.
It would be fun, if all you are after for isthat "kilig" feeling. But then I learned that although it was only apseudo-relationship, the emotions were real. And usually, in thiskind of set up, ang merong malulugi.. ung nainlove sa taong takenna. Una, you can't ask him/her to commit. Since it's not really arelationship, you can't demand commitment from your partner.
Anoba kayo? You will always be uncertain about your role in his/herlife. You can't expect him/her to be always there with you. And ifyou feel jealous of the other boys/girls, you just have to keep it toyourself.
Ano ka ba niya para magselos? Pangalawa, what if youfall deeply in love with him/her? You can't be sure if he/she feels thesame way. Baka nag-a-assume ka lang na mahal ka rin niya. Even ifyou are dying to tell him/her you love him/her, you can't.
Becauseyou're not sure if he/she will like it. Baka mapahiya ka lang. Thisstage will always make you wonder where you are in therelationship. Or if there is a relationship at all. Pangatlo, what if youbecome attached too much? What if you have invested all youremotions and this man/woman hasn't? What if you remain faithful tohim/her, not entertaining other guys/gals, only to find out that he/sheis seeing other girls/boys?
Isa pang downside ng pseudo-relationships, it is fleeting. When a disagreement sets in, or whenone of you gets cold, then that would be the end of it. Unlike in aserious relationship, hindi mo alam kung saan ka lulugar sa isangpseudo-relationship. Wala kang pinanghahawakan. Kasi sapseudo- relationship, there is no "us." Meron lang "you and me,"hindi "us."
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I guess this is a beautiful mistake too...# ;
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